Saturday, March 15, 2014

Finding Order

Happy second week of Lent everyone! How are your Lenten commitments going? I know it's been a struggle for me to keep to mine as that phone is always whispering my name. (Not audibly - that would be creepy and Siri and I would have to have a chat.)

One thing I didn't expect from slowing down a bit during Lent is that I would also feel called to take a little break from writing. While there have been moments of inspiration, overall I am less inclined to spend time furiously typing away. I've really spent a good deal of time praying about whether writing is a hobby, a talent, or a charism. Deciding to spend time writing inevitably takes time from other things - housework, reading, artwork, praying, etc. Moving through Lent, I want to be especially prayerful about ordering my work and time rightly. 

If it is possible, I have come to the conclusion that my writing is all three - a hobby, a talent, and a charism - but not always all at the same time. I've learned to listen to the cues of the Spirit and step away if I am hurried or frustrated. Charisms bring forth energy, and if the energy isn't coming, then I'm dabbling in words of my own creation. While that isn't always a bad thing, when time is limited, I'm going to stick with the flow of the Spirit. That may mean fewer blogs and resisting a link up just for the sake of a link up. It will be just as hard as putting that phone out of my reach after dinner. I've finally gotten into a pattern of blogging regularly after years of "having a blog." We are sticking with quality over quantity now, though an occasional frivolous post might surface based on nothing by my heart's (or funny bone's) own desire. I make no guarantees.

The struggle continues to find my voice amidst the thousands of voices out there on the internet. Trying to find a home and identity can become exhausting - yet another reason to pull back. Am I a mom blogger who happens to be Catholic? Am I a Catholic blogger who happens to be a mom? What is my primary goal here? I've gotten a few answers, but the rest only time will tell. I know the first part of my mission here is to help myself and others love more boldly - my name means "gift of love" after all. That requires me to post more boldly about issues that can breed a bit of disdain or controversy, like the post about the pro-life movement I've been sitting on for a week because I'm too chicken to put it up yet. {It's one thing to spout off in private company. It is a whole different affair to hit "post" for those thoughts to exists beyond the time and space continuum for all eternity.}

Perhaps at the end of the day I am just a woman who loves to write and happens to be a Catholic wife and mother. Those things color the world in which I live, but maybe I don't have to pick a label and can just write from the heart. Otherwise, the imp in me might take over and begin to write as a purple people eater. I hope you'll come along for the ride!

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1 comment:

  1. I enjoy reading your blog. Whether your posts are entertaining or edifying, they are always pleasing to read. That is probably because I am also a woman, Catholic, and a mom. :)